Gratitude In The Chaos

My body has finally accepted that I do not need to be on alert. It felt weird crawling out of bed at one in the afternoon on March 14th, and I think it’s because I kept thinking I need to do more in my mind. I need to do this, and if I had done this, then this wouldn’t have happened. After talking to my therapist, I agreed that I hadn’t fully processed what happened with my dad. Well, I had processed what occurred, but not my feelings. She told me it was like listening to a third party talking about what had occurred, and I can’t disagree. To be honest, I’m not even sure I truly want to process them now. And maybe this isn’t something I should do publicly, but writing about things has always been easier than truly talking about it sometimes. Writing takes me to this place where I can reveal it all and honestly say fuck you to any judgment that might come my way.

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Why not fix their crown as you fix our own?

I remember seeing a meme that reminded women to fix the crowns of other women without telling them. This is always something that has stood out to me. I could not help but think, I wish more women did this for one another. One of my favorite parts of the movie Isn’t It Romantic is Rebel Wilson’s character Natalie explanation why she hated romantic comedies. One of the reasons she gave was because there’s always competition between the female lead and some overly bitchy female in the office. The females are always pitted against one another. They are always SO ugly with one another.

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