Carbs are not my friend, but I love them so

Last time I went to the doctor I did not care for my results. Through the weight gain and my diet my blood sugar levels became elevated far more than they ever have been. Not yet a diabetic, but higher in the prediabetic world than I’ve ever been. My doctor gave suggestions of the numerous things I needed to cut out of my life and the sad part is as he listed them I thought to myself I’ve already cut out most of those out. So I found myself thinking I will just move on to cutting out the sugars I have added in my life and then work on other carbs. I need to get back to eating less carbs and less sugary goodness. Fine. I openly admit the love affair I had with Oreos and Doritos in Fluffy Talk Part Deux and I knew ultimately these changes I needed to make. Fine again. I can do that I told my doctor. I thought this will be easy.

WELL IT IS NOT EASY! AND YOU KNOW WHY? BECAUSE CARBS ARE NOT MY FRIEND, BUT I LOVE THEM ANYWAY! I love all the carbs. I have realized more carbs exist in what I eat daily than I care to admit. Carbs are everywhere. This isn’t something I was naive to but now that I’m really watching my intake I can’t help but wonder WHAT ELSE DO I HAVE TO EAT?! COME ON! I want to yell at everything in the cabinets, freezer, and I want to go down the chip and cookie aisles specifically at grocery stores now and yell at all the bags. 

Irrational much? Yes. Will I do this? No. None of you have to worry about finding me in a Publix somewhere while yelling YOU ASSHOLE at a random bag of Flaming Hot Cheetos. In all reality it is not the Cheetos fault. It’s the will power in me chanting YOU ARE DELICIOUS AND I NEED YOU. As much as I want them, I don’t need them. Want is a much stronger word though because someone can only have so much will power. We all want that piece of cake at birthday gatherings or the Cadbury Egg on Easter. Okay the latter part is all me and I planned on eating my one egg on Sunday, but our neighbor who had us over for Easter dinner has carrot cake. CARROT CAKE. The one cake I have admitted to craving this month. Insert lack of will power here.

My point is I guess as much as I knew carbs were in everything, I did not consider how hard it would be to pull myself away from most of them. I know deep down this is what is best for my health, but again I did not consider how hard this would be. I have wanted a Coke for some time now but I have resisted drinking anything extra sugary. I do not want to start drinking diet drinks again because I know ultimately they are bad for me. So that leaves me with tea, water, and coffee. Three drinks I’m fine with oddly enough. Gold star there as I do not add sugar to my coffee or a ton of cream. Gold star for no soda.  Maybe I have finally kicked the soda habit. Maybe.

The real problem, my real problem, lies in the rice, pasta, and cereals. Yes, cereals. I LOVE cereal. I have been craving Fruity Pebbles for some time now and FINALLY bought a box before my last doctor’s appointment. You know what sucks about them though? ALL THE ADDED SUGAR. And it isn’t like I didn’t know this before buying them, but I wanted it. I wanted them. I also love Cinnamon Toast Crunch and Lucky Charms. I enjoy Frosted Mini Wheats. I could eat cereal every night and be okay with myself. There’s also the milk one must have to eat cereal. SUGAR, SUGAR IS EVERYWHERE!

Sigh. I just want my pasta salad! Insert whiny emjoi face here.My point is I didn’t realize how much I really need to change my lifestyle and how carbs are truly not my friend until now. My body does not process them well! I do know that good carbs exist and we need them to function just as much as healthy fats and whatnot, but it’s getting that balance that’s far harder than I thought it would be. So don’t be surprised if I have random moments OMG I JUST WANT TO EAT A DAMN PIECE OF CARROT CAKE posts soon. Shorter posts. Maybe that will be the whole post or tweet. That would be a better tweet. You get what I mean though. Just…yeah.

WHY MUST YOU BE SO MEAN TO ME CARBS?!? I JUST WANT TO ENJOY YOU! Only those little butt-munches know why my body does not process them well, despite the fact I feel positive there’s a reason with my body type that explains everything I’d need to know. The whole point is I just need to take in a deep breath and slowly work at eating healthier again. This also means stirring clear from the healthy choices in the frozen food area. The ones I want have far more carbs than not so fresh options will become my friend. Meal prep will become my friend. Meal planning will become my friend. And the carbs? They will become my acquaintances that I indulge in every now and then.

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